1. Week 13 Pick'em Winners: Doc and RavensShallBurn won spread hitting 11 of 15. TitanT won normal with 13 of 15. Week 14 Pick'em will be up by Wednesday evening.

Facts about Critical Theory, Yes they are real facts

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by CriticalTheory, Sep 8, 2006.

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  1. CriticalTheory

    CriticalTheory WestSide 718 ShadowMafia!

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    -CRITICAL IS SO STRONG WEIGHTS LIFT THEMSELVES WHEN HE IS AROUND.

    -CRITICAL DOESNT KICK *****, CRITICAL BEATS THE HELL OUT OF MOFO'S

    -BEFORE NASA HAD A LAUNCH PAD, CRITICAL USED TO THROW THE SHUTTLE INTO ORBIT

    -WHEN CRITICAL STARTED ACTING IN ACTION MOVIES THEY CHANGED THE CATEGORY OF HIS MOVIES TO DOCUMENTARIES BECAUSE IT WAS TOO REAL

    -ARNOLD, RAMBO, AND CHUCK RETIRED WHEN CRITICAL MOVED TO HOLLYWOOD

    -THE DEVIL CALLED CRITICAL AND SAID 'CRITICAL ARE YOU TRYING TO TAKE MY JOB", CRITICAL HUNG UP IN HIS FACE

    -WHEN CRITICAL GETS PULLED OVER BY THE COPS, THEY SEE ITS CRITICAL AND WRITE THEMSELVES A CITATION

    -CRITICAL WALKED THE GREEN MILE.....THEN CAME BACK WITH SOME 'JUNIORS' CHEESECAKE

    -CRITICAL USES THE INTESTINES OF VIET-CONG SOLDIERS TO JUMP ROPE
    -WHEN CRITICAL GOES TO SUBWAY, THEY LET CRITICAL WALK BEHIND THE COUNTER AND MAKE HIS OWN FOOD

    -WITH ONE LOOK CRITICAL MAKES SAMUEL JACKSON PUT ON HIS INSIDE VOICE

    -WHEN CRITICAL DRIVES LIGHTS TURN GREEN BECAUSE THEY KNOW CRITICAL AINT HAVING THAT STOPPING MESS

    [​IMG]

    -CRITICAL DOESNT YAHOO CHAT...YAHOO CHATS WITH CRITICAL

    -GRAVITY IS EVEN SCARED OF CRITICAL, THAT IS WHY HE LEVITATES EVERYWHERE HE GOES

    -CRISS ANGEL TRIED TO MAKE CRITICAL DISAPPEAR, SO CRITICAL MADE CHRIS ANGELS TEETH DISSAPEAR DOWN HIS THROAT

    -DAVID BLAINES NEXT STUNT WILL BE SURVIVING IN A SMALL ROOM WITH AN ANGRY CRITICAL THEORY

    -CRITICAL IS SO INTIMIDATING EVEN JAY-Z ADMITTED TO WILLIE THAT HE BIT BIGGIES LYRICS, APOLOGIZED THEN OFFERED BEYONCE AS A GIFT

    -SUPERHEAD TRIED TO DOME CRITICAL , SHE HAD TO HAVE HER JAW REATTATCHED LATER THAT NIGHT

    -WHEN CRITICAL TAKES A DUMP, IT ALWAYS SMELLS LIKE ISSEY MIYAKE

    -CRITICAL WENT TO CHINA WHEN THE POPULATION WAS 100,000, WHEN HE LEFT THEY HAD OVER A BILLION...YOU DO THE MATH.

    -WHEN CRITICAL FARTS, GLASS SHATTERS.

    -CRITICAL PLAYED CHESS ONE TIME, WHEN CRITICAL SAT DOWN, THE KING PIECE GAVE UP IMMEDIATELY.

    -BUMS DONT ASK CRITICAL FOR CHANGE, BECAUSE THEORY SMACKS THE HELL OUT OF EM IF THEY DO.

    -CRITICAL CAN EAT LOADS OF RIBS AND NOT GET THE 'ITIS'.

    -CRITICAL DOESNT NEED MONEY, ANYWHERE HE GOES HE JUST STUFFS A BASKET AND WALKS THE HELL OUT WITH NO QUESTIONS ASKED.

    -WHEN CRITICAL WAS A KID....ACTUALLY CRITICAL FELL OUT THE HOLE FULL GROWN & FULLY CLOTHED.

    [​IMG]

    -CRITICAL WENT TO A PRINCE CONCERT, JUST TO SMACK THAT LITTLE MOTHERFOCKER OUT OF HIS METROSEXUAL MINDSTATE.

    -WHEN CRITICAL SHAVES HE DOESNT NEED RAZORS, HE JUST PUTS SHAVING CREME ON HIS FINGER AND SLIDES IT DOWN HIS CHEEK.

    -CRITICAL DOESNT HAVE TO LOOK FOR OSAMA, WHEN OSAMA FOUND OUT CRITICAL WANTED TO KNOW WHERE HE WAS OSAMA CALLED CRITICAL'S CELL PHONE IMMEDIATELY.

    -CRITICAL FISHES BY YELLING AT THE WATER "GET IN THE F*CKIN BOAT" AND LOADS OF FISH JUST JUMP INTO CRITICALS NET.

    -CRITICAL DOESNT NEED A GUN, HE JUST SWALLOWS BOXES OF BULLETS AND SPITS THEM OUT AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT

    [​IMG]

    -CRITICAL HAS NEVER LOST A GAME OF CONNECT FOUR.....EVER.

    -CRITICAL IS THE ONLY MAN IN HISTORY TO HAVE HIS OWN COMMUNITY CHEAST CARD ON MONOPOLY...'EVERYONE PAY WILLE BEAMON 500.00 OR GET ****ED UP"

    -CRITICAL IS THE ONLY MOTHERFOCKER STEVE JAMES IS SCARED OF.

    -CRITICAL SWEATS NAPALM AND PISSES HYDROCHLORIC ACID.

    -CRITICALTOLD 'BIG PAPI' HE LOOKED LIKE ESTER ROLLE....AND BIG PAPI
    LOOKED DOWN AT THE GROUND ACCEPTED THE JOKE AS TRUTH.

    -WHAT WE KNOW AS HMB IS ACTUALLY CRITICAL SALIVA.

    -CRITICAL ONCE FLIPPED A BOOGER AND KILLED THREE BYSTANDERS.

    -THE FROST ON WILLIES FLAKES IS ACTUALLY ANTHRAX DUST, WHICH CRITICAL FINDS TASTY

    [​IMG]

    -MIKE TYSON WAS NEVER THE SAME AFTER SPARRING WITH CRITICAL

    -WHEN CRITICAL HITS A HOMERUN...NOONE EVER CATCHES THE BALL, UNLESS YOU LIVE ON THE MOON

    -CRITICAL DOESNT NEED TO IMPRESS WOMEN, THEY JUST GET NAKED AND HAVE ORGASMS FROM SMELLING CRITICAL AND BEING IN HIS PRESENCE

    -CRITICAL ARMS ARE SO HUGE EVEN HIS CHURCH SUITS HAVE NO SLEEVES

    -CRITICAL EYESIGHT IS SO PRECISE HE CAN PUNCH A GNAT IN THE EYE WITHOUT KNOCKING THE GNAT OUT THE AIR

    -WHEN GROWN WOMEN WANT THEIR GROOVE BACK, THEY CALL CRITICAL NOT DEXTER..

    -CRITICAL DOESNT SLEEP, NOR BLINK....WHEN HE DOES BLINK THAT IS EQUIVALENT TO 8HRS REST.

    #1
  2. titanbuoy

    titanbuoy medium rare ®

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    -Critical has been hanging around with Chuck Norris too much. :))
    #2
  3. SEC 330 BIPOLAR

    SEC 330 BIPOLAR jive turkey

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    Critical needs to post in the lounge.:chuck:
    #3
  4. Crash Override

    Crash Override inVINCEable

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    Critical needs to lay off the drugs.
    #4
  5. The Don

    The Don Upsetting The Apple Cart

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    If the season gets out of hand, I saw we build a cage and raise some money for Gotitans.com.

    Can you go three minutes with Critical?
    #5
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